The Last Three Months.........

The last three months.....wow.  I don't even know where to begin.  I can't believe that Michell has been here for three months already.  In a way it just all seems normal like she has always been with us and then again i can't believe that it's already been three months because it seems like we just brought her home.  She is doing great.  She has learned so much English you would never believe that she didn't know any when we met her.  She is such a happy little girl.  She loves to sing, she loves her brothers and sisters and Dora is her favorite cartoon.
When we went to get her we were told she was still drinking a bottle 4 or 5 times a day and we witnessed this the first couple of days we were with her.  Her first full night with us she woke the next morning around 5 a.m. and said she wanted her bottle.  Martin gave it to her.  That was the last bottle she had :)  I had been given different advice from people about the whole bottle issue.  Some said just don't give it to her once you have her others said take it away as soon as you can once you are home with her and others said let her have it a while so she can adjust.  Anyway, we realized right away that she wasn't drinking it because she "needed" her bottle.  She was drinking it because she was hungry.  Once she was with us she started eating, and eating and eating.  She never asked for it again. When we got her home it was the same way.  She woke up eating and went to bed eating.  I would have to sometimes tell her she couldn't have any more or she had to wait a while to eat again because she was hungry all the time.  That went on for the first couple of months and she quickly gained about 3 lbs.  She weighed 30lbs when we brought her home.  Over the last month that has slowed down....a lot.  I think she now realizes that there will always be enough food so she doesn't have to eat everything at that moment.  She doesn't snack all day long along with three meals.  She eats like a normal three year old child now instead of a growing teenage boy!
Her and Micah get along great.  They play well together and both are learning to share.  It took Micah a while to get used to her but they LOVE each other and they are really cute together.  She also loves her big brother and sisters.  She gets really excited when we go see them or when they are here at the house for a visit.  They all love each other!
It has definitely been an adjustment for me and Martin.  It has been a test of patience, of love, of trust, of everything, but we are doing great.  We wouldn't trade anything for the blessings we have and we are stronger as a couple because of all of this.
Michell talks to her mom at least a couple of times a week.  We have done several video calls and we have sent a care package to her  mom with lots of pictures and videos. She usually talks to her grandparents and other family members at least once a month sometimes more.  They miss her so much and it makes me sad sometimes when i hear them talk to her because you can hear the sadness in their voice but they are trying hard to sound happy for her.
This weekend she had a video call with her mom for about 30 minutes.  (The longest time we've been able to keep Michell interested)  The last 10 minutes was her running around playing, doing flips on the living room floor, singing ABC's for her, doing patty cake, etc... but her mom just watched and cheered her on.  When Michell finally said bye and closed my laptop she quickly opened it back just to peek and see if she was still there.  I told her we would talk to her again soon.  I sent her to her room and told her to make it pretty (clean it) which she usually takes much pride in doing.  After a few minutes she walked back out with HUGE tears in her eyes.  I asked what was wrong and she just shrugged her shoulders.  All I could do was give her a big hug and tell her that both her mommies love her very much and that her other mommy misses her too and she would get to talk to her again really soon.  This completely broke my heart.  She tries to be so brave even at 3 but i know she misses her mommy and that breaks my heart to see her sad.  Of course she was over it within a few minutes and i was still crying about it when Martin walked back in the house a few minutes later.  Even now i get teary eyed just thinking about it. 
This is so hard.  It's hard knowing that you are doing the best you can for someone but at the same time you are also causing pain.  I told Martin I'm sure her mom cries too when she gets off the phone or walks away after a video call and that makes me sad to think about.
There has been an overwhelming amount of joy and happiness brought to our family by this experience but it is still a very emotional journey we are on.  I just pray daily that we do whats right for everyone involved and that we always let this little girl know how much she is loved by everyone in her life.
It makes it all worth while when for no reason she crawls up beside me and gives me a big hug and says I love you mommy :)